Helpful Tips for First-Time Dads
Becoming a parent for the first time can be very scary for both men and women. If you are a first-time dad, you may feel rather overwhelmed by the whole thing, especially if you’ve never spent much time with little ones before.
The great thing about kids is that starting out, they are pretty easy to take care of. They grow more complicated over time, but your skills as a parent grow over time, as well. Do your best. Remember that there is no such thing as a perfect parent. And keep the following tips for first-time dads in mind as you find your way.
Don’t Fall for Every “Must-Have” Product You See
Babies are simple. Basically, they need to be held and loved, fed and kept warm and dry. Beyond that, they don’t need much, especially at first. This won’t stop companies from trying to convince you otherwise. But one of the most important tips for first-time dads is – don’t fall for it. No matter how crucial that “100% Organic Hand-Woven Diaper Carrier” might sound, save your money for something you REALLY need as a new parent – a bottle of wine.
Moments of Regret Are Normal
It is true that babies are simple. But that doesn’t mean that they are easy. Sometimes they cry. A LOT. For no reason that you can figure out. They are clean and dry and fed and still, they cry. Or maybe they aren’t clean and dry at the moment. Perhaps this is one of those times when there are things in your sweet child’s diaper that cause your heart to quake with fear. Or you just changed into your third work shirt of the morning because your little darling keeps spitting up on you. No matter how much you love your little one, there will be moments when you really wonder, “What were we thinking? Why did we think this parenthood thing was a good idea?”
You are not a bad parent. You are simply normal. Don’t worry. Later, when you look at the beautiful face of your sleeping infant, you will be so filled with love, you’ll know you wouldn’t trade this for the world. Not even for season tickets for your favorite sports team.
Dads Who Do the “Icky Stuff” are Sexy
Yes, it might be tempting to leave the unpleasant duties to your partner. You might even try to justify it with thoughts of, “moms are just better at this stuff”, or “I never get the diaper on right.”
But new moms are not automatically better at this stuff just because of their gender. No one likes changing a diaper when it is scary and overflowing. And if you don’t know how to put a diaper on correctly, then you need practice! After all, you’re going to be changing hundreds of diapers before your kid is potty-trained and you can’t be expecting Mom to change them all. No matter how much you may, at times, wish you could.
And when your partner sees you changing a diaper like a hero and taking charge of the baby so she can take a nap, your sexy levels will grow exponentially in her eyes. This can pay off in dividends, but you may have to wait until you both aren’t completely exhausted!
Getting Mushy Over Your Kid is Manly
Kids have a way of making you fall in love with them over and over again. They are experts at melting your heart. You might argue that it is a “survival skill” at times – saying that “kids are cute so you don’t kill them.” There may even be some truth in that. But the fact remains, there are times when you will feel so much emotion for your kids, you feel like you could cry. Go ahead. No matter how much your friends might rib you about it over beers, mushy dads are manly dads!
A Lifetime Commitment of Transitory Moments
You often hear people say things like, “parenthood is a lifetime commitment.” And this is true. But it is a lifetime commitment filled with impermanence. This is both good and bad. When you are going through a difficult stage with your child, it is good and helpful to remember that it won’t last forever. But there are also those moments of sweetness, pride, and profound love that you will feel. And you’ll wish that you could somehow capture that feeling and hold onto it forever. But the best you can do is to try to hang on to those memories the best you can so you can call them up again when you need them – like the day your teenager puts a dent in the family car.
Parenthood is not for the weak of heart. But the first time you see the precious little face of your newborn baby, you will know that nothing else matters. You are a daddy, and daddies are heroes in the eyes of those who love them.
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